She had enough

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Source:Jeremy McGilvrey via Unsplash

I was on Twitter the other day when I stumbled upon the story of Gertrude Ngoma 26, and Herbert Salaliki 28, a couple who had been dating for 8 years and found the story hilarious.

Being in my quarter-life crisis and listening to my biological clock slowly tick away, I also found the story strangely relatable.

According to the local news reports at Tuko, instead of asking for a breakup like the majority of women would do, Gertrude decided to take a more legal approach by suing her boyfriend of 8 years for refusing to propose to her.

Sitting her…


Here’s how I feel…

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Photo by Luis Galvez via Unsplash

I finally finished with my ex of 3 years back in July, we had broken up at the beginning of the lockdown due to the fact that we couldn’t be in one place, I wanted this to happen, but he was very reluctant to make the move.

I had spent my day creating an office space for him, a cute card on his side of the office with his name scribbled, and a poorly drawn heart to make things more romantic. …


Without blaming yourself for it

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Source: Priscilla Du Preez via Unsplash

So you finally expressed your feelings to someone you like.

You had expectations of how it might go, good or bad, and maybe even prepared for the worst. You might have sent the message and switched off your notifications, sweating with anxiety the whole day, as you try to distract yourself by binge-watching a series or being extra productive, or perhaps you were hopeful that they felt the same way about you the whole time.

Regardless of your expectations, things didn’t quite go the way you planned. And it turns out they aren’t interested in you in the way you…


Without any ghostwriting experience

A typewriter sits on a wooden desk with stationery
A typewriter sits on a wooden desk with stationery
Source: RetroSupply via Unsplash

After years of writing in my journal and my notes app, I finally decided to take my writing seriously. I had done a bachelor’s degree in chemical engineering, but always knew I wanted to do something creative. A master’s in film didn’t help me as much, I was feeling discouraged so I set out to do some research.

How can I make enough money to avoid my parents being disappointed in my choice to not pursue engineering as a career? Is there a way to make writing more lucrative? …


or just too comfortable in your privilege…

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Source: Marco Testi via Unsplash

I remember sitting in a coffee shop with my friend in September, arguing extensively about the meaning and purpose of life. We spoke about how religion doesn’t allow people to take leaders accountable, leaving them looking to God for solutions to all their problems.

We spoke about astrology, spirituality and social cues.

He disagreed with the majority of the things I said, and I disagreed with him many times. We both agreed we needed more research on religion and astrology, and the psychology behind people’s beliefs in it, before forming a relevant opinion.

But when I asked him what the…


And it’s a mess

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Source: Andrew Kondrakov via Unsplash

Another day, another dumb TikTok trend. It’s 2021 now, hold tight people, it just gets worse. I can very openly say TikTok challenges have increased my existential dread. From dangerous cereal challenges to the idiotic teeth filing challenge, the platform which allows users to post three seconds to one-minute videos just can’t get enough of trendsetters who either don’t think very clearly about the societal and individual implications of their actions or are just plain stupid.

I’ll bet my money on the latter.

The latest popular trend in TikTok is the fufu challenge. Fufu is an African food that is…


Why are you on tinder if you’re not here to hook-up?

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Source: Mika Baumeister via Unsplash

Not so long ago, I was in my all too familiar “men are trash” zone, balancing badly on the misandrist and feminist edge, all of which was inspired by my 3-year relationship which had ended very badly. My ex had moved on quite quickly, and I had promised myself I’d never go anywhere near the male specie ever again. My days were filled with constantly writing poems of heartbreak, my search history consisting of topics such as “how to feel nothing” “how to be heartless” “how to be asexual”.

After a few months of boredom and little to no intellectual…


At the expense of losing my mind…

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Source: Yuris Alhumaydy via Unsplash

I started speaking to this man a couple of months ago, it started off really intense, 2 seconds between each reply and a very strong sense of curiosity and vulnerability on both sides. He would message me first each time, safe to say I was super excited!

Being the very strange girl that I am, I already planned our wedding, wondered what our kids would look like, and even made us dinner every night in my head before going to sleep.

And yes! I know what you must be thinking…. This isn’t normal behaviour, you sound like a Psycho! But…


Without guilt or shame

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Source: Sigmund via Unsplash

I’m usually one to advocate for communication. Tell me about your day, how you’re feeling, your annoying boss and what you think about the weather.

I want to know everything, mainly because of the strong sense of curiosity when I’m getting to know someone or wanting to cater to someone I’ve already established a relationship with. How can I make you feel better if I’m kept in the dark?

I also want to resolve everything. Because just like you, I was told that misunderstandings can be resolved very easily by communication, and whilst that statement is true, here comes the…


At first,

I played a widow

And mourned the strong side of me

In a society that regards my strength

as befitting,

Only for a man with two sacks

I…

Thetextbookgirl

23 year old poet, writer and filmmaker from the United Kingdom! Self-Published author of two books!

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